Spiritual Support | Stress

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In my book “Beyond Faith…Into Freedom!” I share with you on a number of tools available to guide you a space where you can achieve greater happiness, peace of mind and love by choosing your State of Being. Most people feel that conditions in their lives must look a certain way first before you can achieve these States of Being, fortunately this is not the case.

I know when I personally began to grasp this concept after reading “When Everything Changes, Change Everything” by Neale Donald Walsch, the author of “Conversations With God” I began to see how by setting my intentions for how I feel and what State of Being I choose to experience I began to have a greater freedom in my life, I was not so much at the mercy of the events in my life.

When I speak of spiritual Support I offer it is not about helping you to change the events and circumstances of your life, instead we will work together to help you find a new perspective about the very events and circumstances of your life that are now leading you from peace into fear.

It does not mean you will no longer face challenges that disturb or upset you, but will be able to find peace, regardless of them.

Imagine, your checkbook is close to $0 and you have bills due and instead of fear and anxiety you typically experience you can face and deal with the situation from a more peaceful place, making better decisions on how to best handle the upcoming bills situation. The truth is we all handle situations in a more effective manner when we are not fearful or stressed over them.

What tool do you currently use to handle stress? Are they effective or do you experience stress again fairly regularly? Would you like to be able to handle stress more effectively?

 

 

 

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Fear as a Guide

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Walking through your fear is a sure guide to peaceful living. When you become willing to face your fears and move beyond them you are going to know peace in your life on a deeper level. No longer does fear need to control your life, but instead be a door to a new life.

For many fear of life leads to anger, frustration and poor decisions and actions.

I recently observed how fear led immediately to anger when my friend’s dog was almost hit by a truck. As soon as the dog ran into the road he began screaming at the dog to come back, but the dog continued to chase after whatever it saw not seeing the fast approaching truck. Instead of relief that his dog wasn’t hurt my friend stayed in anger bordering on rage at both the dog and at the driver of the truck. In this case the tension ended fairly quick, the dog came back and the driver of the truck continued on his way, no damage done.

This situation could have easily escalated if the dog was hit, the driver stayed or my friend acted out on his fear. We see it all the time, road rage incidents, random violence or worse.

It all comes down to reacting out on whatever fear we may be facing at the time without conscious thought of what is really controlling us in the moment fear hits.

What if instead your first thought was “Thank you God”

Everything would change.

Fear would instantly change to gratitude.

No longer would fear have a place to take hold of your thoughts and lead you down a dark road.

Regardless of the outcome from whatever situation you face the result will be one of peace.

Even if a beloved pet is hit by a speeding truck.

Even if your relationship ends, you lose your job or yes, develop a life threatening illness.

Choose gratitude first.

All situations and events we face are going to produce thoughts and feelings within us so we may as well choose what we are going to feel, something positive over something negative. It may not always feel like we have a choice in these matters, but we do. And which choice we make will determine how we move through these events.

Choosing fear leads to yelling at screaming at the dog and at the truck driver. Choosing gratitude produces a nice hug for the dog that fortunately was spared in this instant.

So when you feel fear come into your life in whatever form, pause and know you are at a intersection, one road leads to peace and the other a darker road.

Loss of Relationship

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One of the many challenging situations many of us face over the years is in how to handle the loss of a relationship. Rarely is it a mutual choice between both partners when a relationship ends. Learning to handle the changes that come about with the ending of a relationship can be one of complete pain and a time of trial or it can be one of joy, the choice is entirely up to you.

Yes, you heard me correctly, a breakup can be a truly joyous event in your life, regardless of how difficult it may seem to you at the time.

This is true no matter the circumstances of a breakup, be it from death of a partner, divorce or just a lack of connection with your partner. Even if it involves work, finances or child custody issues or a combination of all of the above.

The answer to this is in your perspective. Most people choose to see a breakup and all that goes with them as something “bad.” The reality is “this person you once cared for (or still do) is no longer an active part of your life and _____, ______ and  ______  (fill in the blanks) are the results I have to face now.

I would like to present you with one of the core messages from “Conversations With God” by Neale Donald Walsch to illustrate how you can better understand how you can move through a breakup with a higher level of peace.

“You are the creator of your own reality, using the Three Tools of Creation: Thought, Word, and Action.”

What this mean is that consciously or unconsciously whatever situation you are facing is a result of what you are thinking, saying or doing. Yes, it becomes a matter of taking full responsibility for what you are facing, even when it seems to be fully the fault of another.

This is difficult for most of us to accept, especially in difficult times.

Until you are willing to accept responsibility for what you are facing you are not going to be able to move forward in your life.

Hint, you may not get this right away, it can take weeks, months or even years at times for you to grasp this concept fully, let alone embrace it in every situation you face.

Let me share a short story of what I faced and how I was able to move beyond the pain of a lost relationship I faced.

I had met my friend at the church I attend and we began to spend time together. It was a slow forming relationship due to some of the challenges she had and still was facing as a result of her previous marriage. Over the course of a few months the relationship deepened and we began to make plans to relocate together to be able to help with her father who had been recently diagnosed with terminal cancer. In the last couple of weeks before we were to leave she became more and more distant from me, rather than coming together as I felt should happen. I had a choice to make! I could go ahead and make the move with her and “try and make things work” or I could stay and let the relationship end. It was a difficult decision for sure, but in the end i choose to stay and she moved up to her father’s house.

It was painful, yet only for a short period of time as i was able to put this concept of thought, word and deed into action.

Once removed from the initial feelings of loss and frustration over how events transpired I was able to look at things from a different perspective.

Personally I find it helps to give yourself a short period of time to allow the feelings to release a bit. The time it takes will be different for each of us, but it does not have to become a long period of time. It can be as short as a day or up to a couple of weeks, any longer and you allow yourself to get caught up in suffering which will take on a life of its own as many of us have experienced in the past.

Once I was able to look objectively on the situation I was able to see the ending of the relationship as a “good” thing. In this case I am still in contact with my friend and have heard some of what I would have faced if I had moved with her and that helped me to know I made the best choice in ending that “form” of the relationship with her.

I was able to look at the positives in the relationship we had, the progress we both made while together and even the benefits of breaking up while still allowing the friendship to continue.

All too often we get caught up in what the form of a relationship is, be it marriage, long term relationship or even a friendship that we have certain expectations that when they are not met we choose to feel extended pain or even suffering when things end. And from this pain and suffering we create experiences that will “prove” why we are feeling the way we are.

Instead when living life from a more spiritual awareness we can instead choose thought, words and deeds that can create a positive experience even when facing difficult challenges in life such as the loss of a cherished relationship.

It all begins with a willingness to see things differently, to live from a higher state and to practice self-love no matter what’s going on in your life.

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The Journey to Peace

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“I want the Peace of God” is a lesson from A Course In Miracles (ACIM) that for me is a powerful reminder of what my number one goal in life must be. When I place Peace first it does not matter what’s going on in my life. Choosing Peace over work, relationships and even money allows me to make progress in all these areas.

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